As we all know, parents who spank their children are insidiously abusive bigots and should be incarcerated for infantile assault. After all, when teaching unimportant lessons such as, “don’t run out in the road” and, “don’t touch the searing stove,” it is of the utmost importance that we preserve our child’s inner psyche. To slap a child’s hand when they reach for the stove is far too cruel. Instead, we should let them touch the burning coals themselves. To spank a child for biting or hitting other children is also pure evil. Rather, parents should simply permit the unruliness. Let them run free. Let them make their own mistakes. Right? No?
Perhaps we should instead use highly complex reinforcement strategies explaining to the three year old that self destructive behavior is dangerous. We could even use a multi-colored powerpoint to truly get the message across. Is this parenting at its best? No?
I know, lets just beat those inconsiderate guilty little wretches into a bloody pulp. That’ll teach them to listen. Why after a few days, they wont even be able to move much less misbehave.
None of the above are, in my opinion, wholesome parenting strategies. I say that in order to effectively raise a child you must find a balance between these extremes. Discipline, by definition, simply means to teach. According to David G. Myers, Ph.D. of psychology, author of multiple scientific articles, and John Dirk Werkman Professor of Psychology at the University of Iowa, there are two ways to shape behavior: reinforcement and punishment. Both should be used in teaching. reinforcement to bolster positive behaviors, and punishment to quell negative behaviors.
Spanking, one extremely controversial form of punishment, can have both positive and negative effects. If done correctly, it is beneficial to the child. If done wrong, the parent becomes abusive. My point? Active parenting, not merely spanking or not-spanking is the key. Problems aren’t created when children are disciplined. They are created when children are neglected.
Boys Town psychologist Robert Larzelere (1996, 1999, 2000), says that spanking is effective when used on young children, but should always be accompanied by a healthy dose of parental affection and a bit of reason. Obviously, corporal punishment conduces associative learning, and is therefore, beneficial in teaching children not to participate in self destructive behaviors. Judging from my own experience, I believe that spanking is necessary in training children. Proper spanking is not abuse. It is conditioning. Angrily striking, on the other hand, is unethical and damaging.
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